Building Leaders


Building Leaders

Intentional vs Unexpected

Welcome to Day 2 of this training on the 5 Powerful Secrets to Help You Speak Up with Unshakable Confidence And Exude A Powerful Presence.

In our last video, we talked about the pivotal role confidence plays in your personal and professional life.

Believing in yourself makes everything possible. 

Trusting your ability to confidently articulate your thoughts clearly establishes you as a leader, decision-maker, and someone deserving of recognition and respect.

Today, I’m sharing Secret #2 with you, which will help you take the next step using what you have learned about yourself in Secret #1.

Now one of the biggest obstacles to Speak Up with Unshakable Confidence And Exude A Powerful Presence stems from fear. 

The role fear plays

Our fears hold us hostage and prevent us from expressing ourselves clearly. 

We shy away from opportunities, we stay silent instead of speaking up, we allow others to steamroll us in meetings, we say yes when we really want to say no, we allow our emotions to get the best of us during hard conversations…

When you look at your self-assessment and ask yourself why you got those answers you’ll find that somewhere in there, there’s fear: a fear of criticism, rejection, humiliation, failure, judgment. 

Our fears take over.

Between the fear of rejection and walking into a room with authority and poise there is a gap. 

Between the fear of criticism and speaking up with conviction and emotional resilience there is a gap.

Between the fear of judgement and imposter syndrome and expressing my ideas with clarity and assertiveness, there is a gap.

And it’s that gap that we need to fill.

Secret #2

This takes us to Secret #2 to fill in that gap: Fear-Exposure

Fear exposure is a deliberate and systematic approach to confronting and gradually desensitizing yourself to fears and anxieties.

Fear exposure involves intentionally putting yourself in situations that trigger your fears. 

You might be thinking: I already feel fear, why would I intentionally put myself in situations that bring out the very fears I am looking to overcome?

Why Fear Exposure?

The distinction between experiencing fear in an unexpected situation (for example, being asked to give an impromptu presentation) and deliberately putting yourself in a situation where fear may arise (volunteering to be part of a panel at the next corporate event) lies in the element of control and intentionality.

This deliberate choice gives you control over the degree and intensity of the exposure. 

You can gradually increase the difficulty of the situations as they become more comfortable, allowing for a systematic and controlled approach.

Unexpected Situation: Fear arises as a natural response to a perceived threat or challenge.

Deliberate Exposure: Fear is embraced as a tool for growth, resilience-building, and overcoming specific fears.

The thing with fear is that it’s an emotion and just like any other emotions, it’s when we know how to manage them which leads us to our third secret in tomorrow’s video.

Share your reflections, questions, or breakthrough moments in the comments below. Don’t miss the opportunity to own your voice and claim your space—playing small is over!

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