HOW TO BE AUTHENTIC – NOT A CHEAP VERSION OF YOURSELF

learn to be your authentic self and reach for the life you deserve

Ever catch yourself spending hours looking through your social media feed? You look at all those amazingly beautiful man and woman, envious of all the places they travel, the body they parade on the beach, the perfectly styled home they live in, the lavish lifestyle they portrait.

And as you scroll down, you glimpse over a picture of a close friend and you laugh a little because you realize that doesn’t even look like her. It’s a filtered, enhanced and sculpted picture of her and you wonder why she bothered doing that, since she is such a naturally beautiful person.

But you shrug it off and keep scrolling down, not taking the time to realize that most of what you see on your feed is also filtered, enhanced and sculpted to look and feel a certain way. A way that will make you envious of the life you think they have, as you frown at the life that you do have.

And as you search for meaning in your own life, as you are figuring out who you are and what you are meant to accomplish in this lifetime, you think that maybe, maybe, by emulating those you see on social media, you will also have their life.

At that moment, you have given up on your own path, to follow someone else’s path.

 

And no great achievement comes from following someone else’s path. Simply because it is not your path.

Your path is designed for you and by you. It calls upon all of your talents, characteristics, strengths and weaknesses. It is tailored made for you so you can accomplish what you are meant to, in this lifetime.

Following your path is what makes you authentic. It’s what makes you unique.

By following someone else’s path, you are cheating yourself out of your own greatness. You are allowing yourself to become a cheap version of you.

And you didn’t come into this world to be a cheap version of you. You came into this world to be a fantastic version of you.

So how do you avoid being a cheap know-off?

 

You play your own strengths! That’s it, as easy as that.

Ok, maybe not really as easy as that but definitely as simple as that.

The first step to being you is to identify what your strengths are.

Take out a pen and a piece of paper and write down everything you think you are good at.

Then list everything you enjoy doing. What are you passionate about? What motivates you? What sends shivers up and down your spine and makes you smile?

If you find yourself short of inspiration, find a quiet corner and sit in silent meditation. Allow the answers to come to you.

Or go for a silent walk in nature and allow yourself to not think about anything.

Then get back to your pen and paper and get writing again. Write from instinct, not from reflected logic. Write what comes to mind first without allowing your mind to process it.

Then step away from the pen and paper and go do something else. Anything else.

Go for another walk, do laundry, prep dinner, call a friends, watch Netflix. Anything.

Then after an hour or so has passed, go back to your paper and read what you wrote.

Don’t judge yourself. Simple read the words you wrote down and see if you can find some similarities in what you wrote. If you can see yourself in what you wrote.

That is the first step to being authentic. That is the first step in learning to be you. It’s to get to know you.

 

Once you know who you are, you can start following your own path and build your own destiny, without being envious of others or wishing you had their life or worst, trying to recreate what you think their life is like.

Now don’t get me wrong, I also enjoy scrolling down my social media feed.

I too love to see fit bodies, beautiful destinations and gorgeously decorated homes, but my attitude towards it comes from a place of authenticity to myself.

I don’t say: I wish I had her body. I say, wow, she must have worked hard for her body, let me DM her and see if she offers workout programs.

I don’t say: I wish my life allowed me to travel like her. I say, that looks like a beautiful destination that my family and I would definitely enjoy. I’ll write it down somewhere and look into it.

I don’t say: I want to live in her house. I say, she did a phenomenal job at decorating her house. I wonder if some of her bathroom ideas would work in mine.

I appreciate the beauty of what I see from my own authentic space and if I see something I want to implement for myself, I tailor it to me, or to my family…

The difference is in the mind frame.

The drawback to wanting to step into someone else’s shoes is that you’ll never reach the success or happiness you are after.

 

Not because you are less deserving then they are. Not because you are not as good/pretty/smart… as they are. But because their life was not meant to be yours. It’s meant to be theirs. You have your own life to be deserving of.

The Universe will back you up when you call on your own talents and strengths. When you create your own path and follow your own destiny.

The success and happiness that you deserve will manifest itself into your life when you are authentic because the Universe loves you. It cannot love who you pretend to be. It can only love who you are.

And once you discover and align yourself with who you are, the Universe will push you towards the life you are meant to live.

So go grab that pen and paper and start writing. Start discovering your true authentic self.

Love,

Eloise

P.S.

P.S. If you want to learn more about connecting to your authentic self and reaching your full potential, click the pink button below and get started with The Ignition Toolbox. This ebook will teach you how to transform your life and reach for success in only a few minutes a day.

 

 

 

 

How to bring your inner spark back – quickly

How to bring your inner spark back – quickly

 

Life often presents us challenges we feel are too big for our capacity and we wonder how we are going to overcome them. This is turn can create a sudden surge of stress and inner turmoil. Some other times however, it’s our daily routine that finally gets to us. It’s the dreariness of knowing exactly what is going to happen, day in day out, with only very subtle variations. This too can bring on its load of stress and inner turmoil.

I’m often asked how to get unstuck when this happens. Because you’re not necessarily  in a bad place or in a bad situation. Your life is not bad per se. There is actually nothing wrong with your life. There is simply that incessant feeling that your inner spark is gone or at least it doesn’t shine as bright as it used to. You’re wondering what happened but mostly, you’re wondering how to get it back.

So how to bring that inner spark back: prayer!

 

In all my years as a student of spirituality and spiritual concepts, the one tool I always returned to when I needed to get unstuck was prayer.

Why? Because it works, and it works quickly.

Prayer is an open conversation between you and God (as mentioned in a previous post, in speaking about metaphysics, I like to use the term God or Universe interchangeably. If you feel more comfortable to use the term Spirit or Higher Power, I encourage you to do so. By no means am I trying to push a certain way of thinking on you. I actually want the opposite: for you to understand and develop your own views of these concepts. I also refer to God as “he”. Again, that’s just what feels right for me, but if you’re feeling the goddess power, please refer to it as “her”. This is all about your journey and what feels right for you.)

Prayer allows you to lighten your heart and transfer the burden you are carrying onto God.

However you may feel might be above your own strength, but it is not above God’s strength.

So how do you go about praying to restore your inner spark?

 

Like all spiritual tools, there is a way to pray, just like there is a way to meditate or to implement the laws of attraction.

In a nutshell, the quickest way to get your inner spark back through prayer is to pray with the intention to heal and help others. Your honest and truthful intentions to serve others will send the message that you are in a place of abundance and as such, you are are in a place to give to others. By expressing your abundance to God you are positioning yourself to receive even more abundance. And by positioning yourself to receive more abundance, you are clearing the way for whatever burden is overshadowing your inner spark to be removed.

The following excerpt is from Chapter 4 of my eBook, The Ignition Toolbox

“Chapter 4: Prayer

[…]

The Universe doesn’t want you to suffer

 

It is important to remember that the Universe doesn’t want you to live a life of misery.

The Universe wants to restore you to a state of Love.

When you are faced with challenges and crisis, the intensity of the emotions, the grief, the pain, block your connection to Love, your connection to the Universe. And so by asking the Universe to lift the burden of the pain and the grief from your hearts, you are essentially asking the Universe to restore Love; and with Love in your heart, you are able to see more clearly the opportunities that the Universe has laid before you for you to heal or to move past a crisis.

By asking God to restore Love in my heart after my dad’s passing, and to take upon Himself the burden of my pain and suffering, I was able to reconnect with Love and see what was laying in front of me: the possibility to transform my life and heal myself as I healed and transformed the lives of others.

What prayer can do for you

 

Prayer won’t remove all the obstacles in your life. It won’t make your journey smooth and uneventful. What prayer will do though, is open the channel with the Divine. It opens a dialogue between you and God.

You may think that you don’t know how to pray. To get you started and get yourself comfortable with these initial Divine conversations, I offer you these two prayers..

The first prayer was written by St-Francis. It is a prayer for guidance and for direction. It is a favourite of mine as I believe it can bring so much clarity and peace in your life.

The second prayer is a prayer I’ve written for myself, that I wanted to share with you because it has done wonders for me. And I want it to do wonders for you too.

You can recite either one of them daily or alternate between the two. You don’t have to say these exact words and you don’t have to pray to “God”. Like at said at the beginning of this course, you can pray to the Universe or the Divine, or to whomever else you feel called to.

Remember that these are simply prayers to get you started. You can venture out on your own and write your own prayer or go with the flow of the moment. Whatever you feel inspired to say, say it.

 

Prayer from St-Francis

“Lord, Make me and instrument of Thy peace;

Where there is hatred, let me sow love;

Where there is injury, pardon;

Where there is doubt, faith;

Where there is despair, hope;

Where there is sadness, joy.

O, Lord,

Grant that I may not so much seek

To be consoled, as to console;

To be understood, as to understand;

To be loved, as to love;

For it is in giving that we receive,

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

And it is in dying

That we are born to eternal life.

Amen.”

[…] ”

This prayer is one of my favourites and has helped me in many situations.

I hope it does the same for you.

And like always, I love hearing from you. Leave me a comment below and let me know how prayer has helped in your life.

Eloise
xx

P.S. If you want to learn more about prayer or if you are ready to take your journey to the next step, you can purchase my eBook HERE or click on the image below.

2 part series – Find your gift, live with purpose

Mexico ranch flowers_purpose

 

I love strolling around bookstores, checking out new releases, picking up a few and nestling myself in a corner to read a few pages or the entire book. No matter what section I’m browsing through, my feet inevitably carry me to the self-help books. As I read the pages of some of these books, the theme of living a life of purpose is a recurring one.

Although I share the views, and admire, many of these authors, I am sometimes left wondering, if I was a beginner at all of this self-help stuff, how would I begin to know what living a life of purpose is? How would I go about finding my own purpose, without turning my life upside down?

I understand that feeling.

Finding your purpose may not be as complicated as you think and you may not have to look as far, as you think. Your purpose can actually be right under your nose. It seems that sometimes, metaphysical concepts get overcomplicated and thus become intimidating to the newly initiated.

So let’s bring it back to a plain explanation we can all understand.

What does it mean to find your purpose? What does it mean to live a life of purpose?

A little side note before we continue on.  In speaking about metaphysics, I like to use the term God. If you feel more comfortable to use the term Spirit or Universe or Higher Power, I encourage you to do so. By no means am I trying to push a certain way of thinking on you. I actually want the opposite: for you to understand and develop your own views of these concepts. I also refer to God as “he”. Again, that’s just what feels right for me, but if you’re feeling the goddess power, please refer to it as “her”. This is all about your journey and what feels right for you.

Good. Now let’s go back to the concept of purpose.

In laymen terms, finding your purpose means finding the unique gift God gave you. The reason you were created in the first place. The reason you are here, on earth, at this exact time in history. Your purpose is the gift only you have and can share with the world.

Therefore living a life of purpose means living a life that is aligned with your divine gift. A life where you get to share your unique gift with others on a regular basis.

If you think you need to quit your current job or shift your entire life around to live a life of purpose, I’d encourage you to take a closer look at what is already in your life and how your unique gift can be expressed within your current setting. I’m not saying you shouldn’t quit your job or shift your entire life around if that’s what you feel you need to do. I’m just saying, take a moment to look at what’s in front of you before wishing for an overhaul.

Let me explain what I mean with these examples.

Meet my mother-in-law Mary.

Mary is the store manager of a beautiful furniture, décor and accessories store in the West Island of Montreal. The way she goes about her work, the care she has for her employees and the pride she takes in her store, you’d think she’s the owner. She’s also a heck of a saleswoman.

That’s Mary’s talent. She’s an amazing manager. Her meticulous ways and organizational skills enhance that talent.

But that’s not her gift.

Her gift is to be an good listener. That’s right. Her unique gift is to listen.

When a person walks into the store, Mary always asks how their day is going and then she will listen to the answer. She will listen to whatever that person has to say. Often times, that simple gesture of listening, will lead that person to openly confide in her.

You may be wondering why a perfect stranger would confide in the store manager. But that’s Mary’s gift. When she looks at her client and asks “how are you”, that person feels they are listened to. Intentionally listened to. And this is not a sales tactic. At that moment, Mary is only focused on that person.

I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve stopped by that store for a quick hello and someone was either hugging Mary or holding her hands.

Listening to others is Mary’s unique gift. And because she is utilizing her gift, she is living her purpose. By living out her purpose everyday, Mary is not only of service to others, but she is also of service to herself. She is of service to herself because practising her gift everyday allows her to feel alive, to feel meaningful, to feel helpful.

Living out her purpose allows her to root her life in profound joy.

See, her purpose is not fulfilled by her actual job as a store manager. Being a store manager is a demanding job and parts of it are not fun. But her true purpose is fulfilled by what her job gives her and allows her to do everyday: listen to others.

Let me give you another example.

Meet my dear friend Kamilla.

Kamilla is a phenomenal makeup artist. I’m not just saying that because she’s my friend. She truly is that good. With the stroke of her brushes and an orchestrated marriage of colours, she creates beauty. Stunning beauty. She is, a true artist. You can check out her work here and here.

That’s her talent. To create artistry through makeup. But that’s not her gift.

Kamilla is one of the most positive and optimistic person I know. She lives her life on a higher vibrational level.

And that’s her gift. Her positivity, her radiance, is her unique gift from God.

When Kamilla works with a client, it is no longer about the colours and the brushes. It’s about sharing her higher frequency. It’s about inviting that other person into her energetic field and communicating, transferring, that positive frequency to her client.

By doing so, Kamilla is able to bring the inner beauty out of her clients and give them an experience of wellbeing that goes beyond their makeup.

That is her gift. That is how she lives out her purpose everyday. Her purpose is not her job as a makeup artist. It is not the brushes, the bronzer or the blush. Those are the tools that allow her to share her gift. That allow her to live a life of purpose.

By connecting with another person on a positive and higher level, Kamilla not only brings out the inner beauty in others but she brings out her own inner beauty. It’s an exchange of energy. By sharing her gift with others, Kamilla gets to live a life of fulfillment, a life of inner bliss.

That bliss is what I want for you. That is what I want you to find for yourself. 

In the second part of this series, I will breakdown the two part exercise I encourage you to practise for  few minutes everyday, to find your own unique gift, your own unique purpose in life.

I wouldn’t want you to miss the next post so make sure you’ve signed up for the updates either at the bottom of this post or on the side bar, under my bio.

Elle

xx

Photo credit: Cristina Marrone