MAPPING YOUR WAY TO SUCCESS

mapping your way to the life you want - leadership - self leadership

part 3 of 3

Remember the first post of this serie? The one where I mention the 3 leadership skills everyone should learn?

If not, that’s ok, here’s a little recap: the first leadership skill was ownership (that’s a big one and a hard but necessary one at that); the second one was proactivity (this is where things get fun and you get to add some motion to your game); and now the third one: mapping!

Mapping is where everything comes together.

It’s the focus needed once you’ve taken ownership of your circumstances and you’ve decided to move forward, building the life of your choosing.

Re-read that last part for me: the life of your choosing.

That’s right! Self-leadership is about putting you in the driver seat of your own life. And when you in the driver seat, you choose where the car is going!

But if you want the car to go in the direction you want, you need to map out your route.

Mapping is about having a detailed plan of where you are headed.

Ever get in a car, not knowing where you’re going?

Chances are, you won’t get very far. You may drive around and finally figure out where you want to go, but that’s a lot of waisted time. And you shouldn’t have time to waste!

You have a life to enjoy, goals to reach, places to discover, experiences to live…

You need to start mapping!

In the same way your GPS calculates a route, you need to start with your destination.

Your destination is your starting point.

And then work backwards from there. As ironic as it sounds, mapping starts at the end so you properly align your beginning.

Let’s break it down old school : Mapping 101

First, identify where you want to go. This is crucial. I could spend an entire blog post on this (should I? you let me know!).

In order to lead your life, in order to get to the life you are dreaming of, in order to create something grand for yourself… you need to know exactly what that is.

I often hear people tell me they want more money. But what they truly want, are the experiences that money can bring them. Having X amount of money in a bank account is not going to change much. It’s what you are going to do with that money that makes a difference. Whether you spend it on traveling the world, offering yourself or your children a greater education or donating it all to a great cause once your soul has moved on, it that, that you want, not the money itself.

So when you are ready to identify your destination, do so clearly. If you enter in your GPS that you want to go downtown, it may not take you directly to the corner of 3rd and 54th Ave., which is actually what you truly want.

I know I’m being redundant here but be specific. As specific as an address or intersection on a map!

Second, you need to break down the route to your final destination in easily navigable sections.

Each section is a goal, in and of itself.

It is the accomplishment of each of those small goals that gets you to your bigger goal: your destination.

If for example the destination on your map is to be the Executive Director of your division you need to own (first leadership skill!) where you currently are. Let’s say you are currently working at the entry level of customer service, you would need to break down each step (promotions, trainings, networking) in mini-goals.

Each step, each goal, becomes a piece of the road that gets you to your desired destination.

Getting back to our example, if the next step is for you to get promoted to Director of Customer Service, then you need to be proactive (our second leadership skill!) and take all the necessary steps to reach that goal.

And so one and so forth with every small goal until you get to the big final goal.

Third, and this is another one I could repeat ad nauseam, you need to stay the course.

Mapping is only good if you are willing to stay the course.

If midway through your training to become that Director of Customer Service, you decide to quit or you no longer put in the efforts, you need to make that decision knowing you may not reach your intended destination.

Your map will only take you to your destination if you follow the route.

Get your FREE Leadership Cue Cards. Click the button below.

LEADERSHIP SKILLS CUE CARDS

If you choose to go rogue, you may never get to your destination.

And that is something you need to be conscious about.

It’s not enough to want something. It’s not enough to map out your goals and break them down in smaller achievable goals. It’s not enough to start with a heap of enthusiasm.

YOU NEED TO STAY THE COURSE!

Even when it gets tough, even when you are unmotivated, even when you think you no longer want to reach that goal (often times, it’s not that you don’t want to reach that goal, it’s that you don’t want to put in the efforts to reach that goal anymore!), you need to stay the course.

As you can see, the 3 leadership skills you need all build on each other: you need to own your circumstances, in order to be proactive in the pursuit of the goals you map for yourself.

Mapping may seem like the easiest of the skills but in my opinion, it is one of the hardest. Simply because you need to get really personal and honest about what you want and where you want to go.

In order to help you do that, here’s a little meditation and visualization practice to help quiet your mind and get you to listen to that inner whispering voice.

Visualization and Meditation practice

Sit comfortably on a chair or on the floor with your legs crossed, your back straight and your chin slightly tucked in.
Close your eyes and take 8 deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth.
As you breath, focus on the sound of your breath. When your mind wanders away, come back to that sound.
At the end of the 8th breath, go back to your normal breath.
Imagine what it would be like to live the life you truly want: what would it feel like, what would it entail. Be as specific as possible in your visualization. See the details of what you are wearing, where you are standing, what you are saying… See everything in clear details.
Then come back to the sound of your breath.

With time, your destination will be made clear…

Eloïse
xx

Get your FREE Leadership Cue Cards. Click the button below.

LEADERSHIP SKILLS CUE CARDS

Why planning for the worst and hoping for the best is wrong!

goal reaching planning requires proper mindset

You’re sitting at your favourite spot at the kitchen table or in that living room chair, wondering and planning how you are going to get through this situation. Wondering and planning how you should go about it. Wondering and planning how you are going to reach that important goal of yours… So you say to yourself ” well, let’s plan for the worst and hope for the best”, right? Wrong!

I’ve heard that expression countless times and I never liked it. I never agreed with it. Why would you want to plan for the worst and merely hope for the best? Shouldn’t you plan for the best, hope for the best and forget about “the worst” part?

Every battle you face has two angels: your planning and your mindset

 

As you sit in your comfortable spot, setting yourself up to tackle whatever situation you are facing, you must acknowledge that there are two parts to every battle: the planning and your mindset or I should say, the mindset and the planning.

It all being with your mindset.

 

Your mind is your most powerful tool. It is where everything starts. The starting point to all things. Or I should say, the point before there the start…

All battles are won or lost before the battle itself ever begins. And it all begins with your mindset.

If you think you’re going to win, you are probably right. If you think you are going to lose, you are probably right to. If you think the best is gonna happen, it probably will. If you think the worst is gonna happen, it probably will to.

The outcome of a situation is largely determined by how you choose to tackle this situation.

Yes, I did say choose. Because how you show up, how your prepare yourself mentally, how you align your mindset, those are choices you have. You may not have chosen the situation you are in directly (that’s a subject for another day) but you do have the power to choose how you react to it. And your mind is where it’s at.

So before you even begin to formulate a plan on how you are going to fix or get out of a certain situation, you need to get your mindset right.

You need to convince yourself  and truly believe that you are going to find the right solution, you are going to get out of this, you are capable of overcoming this and you will reach whatever goal you have.

If you need a little extra help getting your mindset right, click HERE for my previous post on the 7 unconventional keys to success. And if you wanna take it a step further, click HERE for my eBook, the Ignition Toolbox.

Only once you’ve gotten your head in the game,  and really own the fact that you are on top on the situation, can you start to plan.

By having your mindset adequately aligned, you are setting yourself up to be more receptive to different ideas and more attuned to creative solutions you may not have thought of, had your mindset been off or worst, in a negative space.

Now that you are setup right, let’s plan! 

 

As you begin to formulate a plan as to how to get yourself out of a particular situation begin by asking yourself: what outcome am I looking for? Simply put, start with the end.

Begin planning by first looking at what you want as an end result and work your way up from there.

By starting from the bottom up, you are giving yourself a goal or a target to reach and aligning all your steps with that goal/target.

Your plan should have big steps and little steps to reach your goal.

Your big steps are the larger concepts you need to implement to reach your goal and the little steps are the concrete application of those concepts, into your daily life.

Let’s look at an example:

Let’s say, your self confidence is on the low side and you want to feel better about yourself, for yourself, by losing a few pounds.

First, determine your end goal: how much weight do you wanna lose? 10 pounds. By when: 2 months from now

That’s the end goal: 10 pounds within the next 2 months.

Big steps to lose that weight:

  • increase exercise activity to 30 minutes a day, 6 days a week
  • plan healthy meals ahead of time
  • eat 3 meals and 2 snacks a day to prevent hunger
  • allow one cheat meal a week

Little steps to lose that weight:

  • increase exercise activity to 30 minutes a day, 6 days a week
    • wake up 30 minutes early every day, 6 days a week to fit in exercise
    • find Youtube fitness routine 3X a week
    • go for a walk/run 3 X a week
  • plan healthy meals ahead of time
    • one a week, sit down to plan meals for the week ahead
    • cook weekday meals in batches on Sundays and Wednesdays
    • make a grocery list every week before heading out to prevent temptation
  • eat 3 meals and 2 snacks a day to prevent hunger
    • prepare and pack meals the night before so they are ready to go in the morning
    • leave a printed menu on the fridge door
  • allow one cheat meal a week
    • plan cheat meal to have something to look forward to every week

This is just an example but the list of small steps could go much further and in greater depth.

The point is to start by your goal and determine what needs to be done from there.

So don’t just plan for the worst and hope for the best: Plan like a boss and expect the best!

As always, I love hearing from you. Leave me a comment below and let me know how you set yourself up to tackle difficult situations or reach your goals.

Love,

Eloise

P.S. As of next month, I’ll be sending out additional tips, tricks and all things mindfulness and success to those on my mailing list. Don’t miss out on all this great FREE stuff. Sign-up HERE or sign-up a friend HERE (with their permission of course!)

P.P.S. If you haven’t read The Ignition Toolbox, now is a great time to start. Give yourself all the chances you deserve to succeed! CLICK HERE to get started.

HOW TO BE AUTHENTIC – NOT A CHEAP VERSION OF YOURSELF

learn to be your authentic self and reach for the life you deserve

Ever catch yourself spending hours looking through your social media feed? You look at all those amazingly beautiful man and woman, envious of all the places they travel, the body they parade on the beach, the perfectly styled home they live in, the lavish lifestyle they portrait.

And as you scroll down, you glimpse over a picture of a close friend and you laugh a little because you realize that doesn’t even look like her. It’s a filtered, enhanced and sculpted picture of her and you wonder why she bothered doing that, since she is such a naturally beautiful person.

But you shrug it off and keep scrolling down, not taking the time to realize that most of what you see on your feed is also filtered, enhanced and sculpted to look and feel a certain way. A way that will make you envious of the life you think they have, as you frown at the life that you do have.

And as you search for meaning in your own life, as you are figuring out who you are and what you are meant to accomplish in this lifetime, you think that maybe, maybe, by emulating those you see on social media, you will also have their life.

At that moment, you have given up on your own path, to follow someone else’s path.

 

And no great achievement comes from following someone else’s path. Simply because it is not your path.

Your path is designed for you and by you. It calls upon all of your talents, characteristics, strengths and weaknesses. It is tailored made for you so you can accomplish what you are meant to, in this lifetime.

Following your path is what makes you authentic. It’s what makes you unique.

By following someone else’s path, you are cheating yourself out of your own greatness. You are allowing yourself to become a cheap version of you.

And you didn’t come into this world to be a cheap version of you. You came into this world to be a fantastic version of you.

So how do you avoid being a cheap know-off?

 

You play your own strengths! That’s it, as easy as that.

Ok, maybe not really as easy as that but definitely as simple as that.

The first step to being you is to identify what your strengths are.

Take out a pen and a piece of paper and write down everything you think you are good at.

Then list everything you enjoy doing. What are you passionate about? What motivates you? What sends shivers up and down your spine and makes you smile?

If you find yourself short of inspiration, find a quiet corner and sit in silent meditation. Allow the answers to come to you.

Or go for a silent walk in nature and allow yourself to not think about anything.

Then get back to your pen and paper and get writing again. Write from instinct, not from reflected logic. Write what comes to mind first without allowing your mind to process it.

Then step away from the pen and paper and go do something else. Anything else.

Go for another walk, do laundry, prep dinner, call a friends, watch Netflix. Anything.

Then after an hour or so has passed, go back to your paper and read what you wrote.

Don’t judge yourself. Simple read the words you wrote down and see if you can find some similarities in what you wrote. If you can see yourself in what you wrote.

That is the first step to being authentic. That is the first step in learning to be you. It’s to get to know you.

 

Once you know who you are, you can start following your own path and build your own destiny, without being envious of others or wishing you had their life or worst, trying to recreate what you think their life is like.

Now don’t get me wrong, I also enjoy scrolling down my social media feed.

I too love to see fit bodies, beautiful destinations and gorgeously decorated homes, but my attitude towards it comes from a place of authenticity to myself.

I don’t say: I wish I had her body. I say, wow, she must have worked hard for her body, let me DM her and see if she offers workout programs.

I don’t say: I wish my life allowed me to travel like her. I say, that looks like a beautiful destination that my family and I would definitely enjoy. I’ll write it down somewhere and look into it.

I don’t say: I want to live in her house. I say, she did a phenomenal job at decorating her house. I wonder if some of her bathroom ideas would work in mine.

I appreciate the beauty of what I see from my own authentic space and if I see something I want to implement for myself, I tailor it to me, or to my family…

The difference is in the mind frame.

The drawback to wanting to step into someone else’s shoes is that you’ll never reach the success or happiness you are after.

 

Not because you are less deserving then they are. Not because you are not as good/pretty/smart… as they are. But because their life was not meant to be yours. It’s meant to be theirs. You have your own life to be deserving of.

The Universe will back you up when you call on your own talents and strengths. When you create your own path and follow your own destiny.

The success and happiness that you deserve will manifest itself into your life when you are authentic because the Universe loves you. It cannot love who you pretend to be. It can only love who you are.

And once you discover and align yourself with who you are, the Universe will push you towards the life you are meant to live.

So go grab that pen and paper and start writing. Start discovering your true authentic self.

Love,

Eloise

P.S.

P.S. If you want to learn more about connecting to your authentic self and reaching your full potential, click the pink button below and get started with The Ignition Toolbox. This ebook will teach you how to transform your life and reach for success in only a few minutes a day.

 

 

 

 

SHIFT FEAR INTO ACTION IN ONE EASY STEP

shift your fear into action for sucess

A few months back, I made a video about fear (if you haven’t seen it, watch the video HERE) and explained how we are actually born with only two fears: the fear of loud noises and the fear of being dropped.

Every single other fear we have is learned!

We learn these fears through experiences, encounters and how we process events and information…

But like all learned behaviours, we can unlearn them. We can unlearn how to be afraid. Just like most of us have unlearned the fear of loud noises and the fear of being dropped.

But that’s easier said then done.

 

Fear is very powerful. It sneaks into our subconscious and spreads its roots with lightning speed, often times, without us even realizing it. All of a sudden, something we once enjoyed, scares us half to death.

I vividly remember experiencing this kind of newborn fear when I was a little girl.

My parents had always been involved with our church and by the time I was 11 years old, I was the lector for the First Reading during Sunday mass. It was something I was very proud of and I loved it. I loved being in front of people, speaking to them, connecting with them…

I would spend all week preparing and rehearsing, to make sure I sounded just right and I connected with my audience.

Then one Sunday, after delivering what I thought was a great First Reading, I overheard a member of the communion group say they were surprised that the Priest had agreed to put such a young person in charge of such an important task.

Somehow, in my 11 year old brain, I interpreted that as: I’m not good enough to be a lector!

In the week that followed, I barely rehearsed my Reading. I would find every excuse not to.

The truth was, that suddenly, I was afraid. I was afraid I wasn’t good enough, I was afraid people didn’t like me or didn’t connect with me.

Fear had snuck into my subconscious.

 

When Sunday morning rolled around, I was petrified. I remember sitting in church, sweating, clinching my fists, wishing for all of this to be over soon. The same moments that I relished a week earlier, I now dreaded. The exalted feeling I once had moments before stepping up to the microphone, was replaced by sheer fear.

I was so afraid that I don’t remember how that Reading went. It’s all a blur.

A few weeks days, I told my parents I no longer wanted to be a part of mass.

I wish I would have told them the real reason why, so they could have reasoned with me, but I didn’t. I made up some random excuses, a mixture of school projects and figure skating practises… And I never read at mass again.

It’s quite sad if you think about it, that I let me interpretation of what someone said, turn into such powerful fear that I began to fear something that I actually enjoyed tremendously!

But now tell me, how many of you have experienced a similar situation?

You know you’re good at something, you enjoy whatever it is you are good at, but then you allow one small seed of doubt, one interpretation of a comment or one negative thought, completely derail you.

Fear being the incredible opportunist that it is, sneaks in and voilà! you are now afraid or dreading something you once enjoyed/loved.

So how do you turn that around? How do you go back to enjoying/loving something you’re now afraid of?

 

You reverse fear’s mind trick!

When your mind starts to wander and you begin to feel that first tingle of fear, take a deep breath and bring yourself back to a time when you weren’t fearful, a time when you enjoyed that particular activity. Allow that feeling to play out in your mind.

Remember everything you can about that joyful moment and play it out like a movie. Remember the good emotions, the thrill, the connection, the enthusiasm, the excitement, the love.

Don’t allow any negative thought to take part in your movie.

You are the director. You choose how this movie begins, unfolds and ends.

The more you allow yourself to go back to those happy feelings, the more fear will loossen it’s grip on you.

The important thing to remember, is to never let fear take over you to a point where you give up something you once enjoyed.

I greatly regretted giving up reading at church. It may not seem like much, but it was a big thing for me. It was my first experience at public speaking and it took me a long time to get back to something I realized I actually loved doing.

Fear got in my way and took many opportunities away from me. Because I let it.

But now I know better and I hope that you do to.

When fear rears its ugly head, know that you are more powerful than it is and that whatever positive, impactful and loving feelings you have, can overcome it.

Fear is darkness and you are light.

Don’t be afraid to shine!

Love always,

Eloise

P.S. If you want to learn more about conquering fears and reaching your full potential, click the pink button below and get started with The Ignition Toolbox. This ebook will teach you how to transform your life and reach for success in only a few minutes a day.

THE UP SIDE OF FAILURE

failure paves the road to success

I say we should celebrate failure. Our failures should be as glorified as our successes because often times they are the platforms that propel us to our greatest successes.

And it doesn’t matter how many times you fail.

It doesn’t matter if you’ve failed once or a hundred times.

What truly matters is how you react to your failures.

I understand that failure is not a popular topic. It’s not something you see plastered all over social media. It’s not something people brag about and it’s definitely not something that is rewarded in today’s society.

Why? Because in all honesty, failure sucks!

It hurts our ego. It can feel overwhelming and shameful. It takes us out of our comfort zone and makes us come face to face with some of life’s greatest lessons.

In summary, failures are hard…

That being said, failure happens to EVERYONE.

Walt Disney was fired from his newspaper job because he was told he lacked creativity.

Billa Gates dropped out of Harvard and started Traf-O-Data, a company that failed miserably.

Basketball legend, Michael Jordan, once said “I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Oprah Winfrey was fired from her first television job as an anchor in Baltimore. Oprah’s first boss told her she was too emotional and not right for television.

Yet, these are people wildly known for their successes.

So what differentiates those who succeed after failure?

The difference between those who succeed after suffering a hard blow and those who don’t, has nothing to do with the failure itself. It has everything to do with how one reacts to the failure.

I have faced many setbacks and many failures in my life and as much as it sucked and it hurt and it often times crushed my ego, it also allowed me to learn the greatest lessons.

And here’s another thing I’ve learned… It boils down to your willingness to learn the lessons life is trying to teach you.

If you choose to remain stubborn and refuse to open up to what life is trying to teach you, you will fail again and again. But if you open up your heart and your mind and you are willing to relentlessly work towards your goal, then the Universe will reward you.

Here’s a little motivational video to inspire you when the weight of failure gets too heavy.

And for even more motivation, don’t forget to download your FREE productivity cheat sheet to help you turn that failure into a resonating success!  

CHEAT SHEET

https://www.facebook.com/lifebyeloise/videos/236254633663963/

As always, I love hearing from you.

Send me an email or leave a comment below and tell me what failures you’ve gone through and what lessons you’ve learned from them.

Love,

Eloise

HOW TO BECOME A CONTROL FREAK – THE GOOD KIND!

become a control freak of your mind and your reactions

Back in my early teen years, I was a total control freak. I felt that the only way I could get ahead, and get the results I wanted, was to control every aspect of my life.

It was the dire opposite of what I was learning in my yoga and meditation practice and definitely not aligned with all the spiritual books my father was strongly encouraging me to read.

Yet somehow, I had gotten it in my head that to be successful at anything, including yoga and meditation, I needed to control everything.

It made for a very stressful life and left very little wiggle room for the Universe to work its magic.

Luckily (I say luckily now, although I didn’t think I was so lucky at the time!), through hardship and challenges, the Universe showed me that the control I thought I had was a complete illusion.

That in fact, I controlled very little.

Except one thing.

I could always control one thing.

And that thing, that one thing, was how I perceived what was happening to me and how I responded to it.

That’s it.

That’s all.

But actually, that’s all that really matters.

In his book The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari (one of my top 5 books. Read why HERE) Robin Sharma explains to us that reality actually doesn’t exist.

That there are no absolutes. That “an event that appears to be a tragedy to one might reveal the seeds of unlimited opportunity to another.”

The only thing that is real is how we react and process what is happening to us in the present moment.

Granted, that is not an easy lesson to learn. And an even harder one to implement.

But if you do, it will change your life. I promise.

Knowing you have very little control over anything in your life allows you to let go of what is actually preventing you from moving forward, reaching your goals and embracing your true potential.

On the positive side, it allows you to develop greater control over what truly has an impact on your life: your reaction and processing of the events that are happening to you.

And that’s the type of control freak you want to be: the good kind of control freak.

So how do you become a good control freak?

The key is to start small.

Start paying attention at your reactions, as they are happening. Don’t allow your mind to wander off, unguarded, and tangle you in negative thoughts.

Here’s an example:

It’s a rainy Saturday morning and you need to run some errands.

You get to the shopping mall and start driving around in circles, looking for that perfect parking spot, close to the entrance.

From the corner of your eye, you see a car slowly backing out of that coveted spot. You race over, put your flasher on and wait. As the car finally backs out of your spot, another car from the other side, slips right in.

At that very moment, you have two options:

1.Start fuming with anger. Yell profanities at the other driver for “stealing” your spot while explaining you were there “first” (so you thought), and allow that incident to get you in a horrible mood for the remainder of the morning (if not the remainder of the day as you share the incident with your partner, friends and maybe even on your Facebook and Instagram followers, giving even more momentum and power to the incident).

Or:

2. You laugh at the irony of you waiting there for absolutely no reason. Realize it’s simply a parking spot. That maybe the other car couldn’t see you signalling as the third car was backing out of the parking spot. That you actually could use a little more exercise by parking further and that in fact you have a beautiful umbrella in the trunk of your car that you rarely ever use. So you smile at to the driver that got the spot and go on your merry way, laughing at the ridicule of the situation and setting yourself up for a beautiful and cheerful day. And maybe you share how you handled the situation with your Facebook and Instagram followers, giving momentum and power to your positive attitude.

See the difference?

The first option will have you all rattled up and angry, which will lead to absolutely nothing good. And the second option has you smiling at life and setting you up for positive experiences.

Same event, two completely different ways to approach it.

That being said, don’t interpret this example as me telling you to be a door mat and allow people to walk all over you.

If you feel you’ve been wronged in a situation, it is your right and obligation to speak up. But do so in a way that is polite, courteous, diplomatic and compassionate. Control your emotions within the conflict. Don’t allow a negative emotion to dictate how you will handle the situation.

In other words, train your mind to look for the positive first, before allowing yourself any negative thought.

Be a control freak of the thoughts you think.

As you begin to train your mind to see the positive in the small events of your life, the control you exert over your mind will grow to allow you to handle the more challenging events.

Remember, absolute reality does not exist, only your reaction and your processing of the events are real.

So think about how you want your reality to unfold: positive and happy or negative and angry.

The choice is entirely yours.

And it is one of the very few choices you entirely own, SO OWN IT FULLY!

As always, I love hearing from you. After reading this post, leave me a comment below or send me an email and let me know, with concrete examples, how you think you can become a good control freak.

If you want to fast track your way to becoming a good control freak, check out The Ignition Toolbox HERE.

Love,

Eloise

FAIL PROOF NOT-SO-MORNING ROUTINE

morning routines that adapt to your lifestyle

Back in the days when I was single and free, I followed an army-like morning routine.

I woke up at 4:45am, drank a tall glass of lemon water, meditated, prayed and journaled. Took my dog for a walk then grabbed my gym bag (that was prepared the night before) and my lunch bag (that was also prepared the night before) and headed out the door for my morning gym workout and my long day at the office.

And that’s how my day started. Every. Single. Day.

The only variant was on the weekends, when I would allow myself to “sleep in” until 7am.

But why the rigidity…

 

I followed such a rigid routine because I had read somewhere, in some productivity and success book(s), that the most successful people on earth all followed a very structured morning routine. And I wanted to be very successful. So I implemented the same principles.

I loved my morning routine. I was deeply attached to it.

It gave me a sense of purpose and drive. It set my mood on “go” for the rest of the day and energized my long working hours.

It was never my intention to change my routine. But then, like for many of us, life happened.

When my husband and I were finally able to have a viable pregnancy, I suffered complications and was put on bedrest. My morning routine was out the window.

I felt lost.

The dangers of attaching yourself to a routine

 

How many times has this happened to you?

You put all your efforts into creating a new routine for yourself. Maybe you want your day to start off with some meditation or go for a silent walk to clear your head for the day.

Everyday, you diligently put all your efforts towards reinforcing your new routine.

And as your routine slowly becomes a part of your life, you begin to attach yourself to this new routine. You look forward to your morning ritual and begin to depend on it to set the mood for the rest of your day.

But then one morning, something happens and you can’t meditate or go for your silent walk. And you feel awkward for the rest of the day.

Then the next morning, something else comes up that again, prevents you from going through with your morning ritual…

You start to blame yourself, you become bitter about your life and your circumstances and soon enough you are simply discouraged and have given up on the whole thing altogether.

Setting a not-so-good tone for the rest of your day.

But what if it was all about the “what” and not the “when”

 

As I navigated the ups and downs of a difficult first pregnancy, I became animate about finding another way to get that feeling of accomplishment again.

My new “morning routine” would not only need to fit my current situation, but also be adaptable to the upcoming changes in our lives.

What I soon figured out is that it wasn’t as much about the “when”, then it was about the “what”, in my morning routine that gave me that feeling of accomplishment and a positive outlook.

So I looked at the components of my former morning ritual: water, meditating, praying, journaling, walking the dog and working out.

In summary, my morning routine was about taking care of my mind, first and foremost, and then taking care of my body.

My new “not so morning” routine

 

By the time our first son was born, I had implemented my new not-so-morning routine.

It wasn’t so much about the rigidity and the “get it all done” mentality. It was about including all the former components of my routine that made me feel good, at some point during my morning.

My new routine looked something like this: I would meditate and pray while feeding my son in the early morning hours. Then I would journal for a few minutes after I put him back to sleep (and going back to sleep myself!)

Walking our dog became a family walk with baby in the stroller and our dog happily strutting along sometime close to the first morning nap.

My workouts were done as a high intensity circuit format during our son’s second morning nap.

By the time noon rolled around, my entire morning ritual had been completed, spread across the morning hours, sometime between 4 am and noon.

I didn’t feel stressed about getting it all done at the same time. I allowed myself the freedom to modify the routine as my day went along, making sure to keep the essence of it.

This new way of doing gave me the sense of accomplishment I needed.

How to set up your own “not so morning” routine

 

You may not be dealing with similar issues of forced bed rest and a newborn, but you may be dealing with circumstances that momentarily, or permanently, are preventing you from keeping up your beloved morning ritual.

If that is the case, follow these steps to establish another routine that will bring you the same sense of accomplishment, without any of the guilt of getting off track.

1.Deconstruct your previous routine: breakdown each element that composed your morning routine. From having coffee, to heading out to the gym, to spending time cuddling your pet. Whatever time was spent doing an activity in your former routine, is an element in its own.

2. Group items together: Once your routine is decomposed, only put back together in blocks, the items you feel need to be done in a consecutive sequence. For me, meditation and prayer go together, so I needed to combine those. For you, maybe it’s drinking your first cup of coffee and heading out for a run.

3. Make time, at some point in your morning, for each block of your routine: say your former routine included prayer, journaling, drinking a hot cup of coffee, heading out for a run and getting ready for work. But now, for whatever reason, that routine is not sustainable. Break it down, starting by what can only be done within the first few hours of the morning. If you know that you can only go for a run in the early morning, then start off your day with that. Get that hot cup of coffee and that morning run in, first thing in the morning, before getting ready for work. Then plan your prayer and journaling at another time in your morning. Schedule it in your agenda as you would any other important meeting. Maybe it can take the place of your morning break or it can be something you practice during your morning commute.(If you need more ideas on how to break down those practices, check out The Ignition Toolbox HERE)

By spreading your morning routine across your entire morning, you won’t feel the unnecessary pressure of getting everything done within a very limited timespan, yet you will get the same feeling of accomplishment.

If you come to the realization that not everything you want to do will get done during your morning, know that is it ok to let go of certain things, momentarily. Be adaptive and be kind to yourself.

Remember, the goal of morning rituals is to set a positive and uplifting tone for the rest of your day. If the pressure of your routine is creating negative energy and undue stress, it’s time to revisit your routine.

I hope you enjoyed my take on morning routines.

As always, I love hearing from you. After reading this post, leave me a comment below or send me an email and let me know how you’ve adapted your morning routine to fit your changing reality.

Love,

Eloïse

 

 

 

 

THE POWER TO PAUSE

power to pause and regroup your thoughts

Do you know how to pause?

 

How often do you wake up with the best of intentions, ready to take on the day, your agenda already filled with the day’s goals, only to get derailed by one of life’s curve balls.

Maybe you got into a fight with your spouse, maybe you got a nasty phone call or maybe your toddler just wasn’t cooperating.

All of a sudden, you are filled with all these negative emotions and ready to toss aside whatever goals you had set for the day.

I’ve seen this happen numerous times.

Take dieting for example.

You start off with the best intentions the moment you step out of bed, but one indulgence of pastries or donuts completely during a morning board meeting completely derails your nutrition goals for the remainder of the day.

One not-so-healthy breakfast turns into a full day of bad food choices (and sometimes an entire weekend!), resulting in guilt, shame and the inevitable negative self-talk.

But there is a way to put an end to this negative thinking cycle and the bleeding of one bad moment into the rest of your day.

And that is, the Power to Pause.

 

When an unexpected event happens and you get caught up in its negativity, it is important to remember to just pause. Stop.

Stop whatever it is you are doing so you can change the energy.

All you need to do is to take a few deep breaths, regroup your thoughts, remember what you committed to for the day and why you committed to it and allow that positive, uplifting energy to settle back in your body, clearing out the negativity.

If you really want to harness the power of the pause, do this with your eyes close.

Here’s my weekly motivational video on the Power to Pause.

https://www.facebook.com/lifebyeloise/videos/219752828647477/

 

This video was inspired by a post my friend Heidi Kotler posted on her Instagram Feed. You can check out her amazing transformational journey towards health and fitness on IG under @heidi_kotler.

I hope you enjoy this video.

As always, I love hearing from you.

After you’ve watched this video let me know in what situation the power to pause has helped you or, in what situation your think you can apply the power to pause.

Leave me a comment below or email me.

Love,

Eloise

EMBRACE CHANGE

embrace change to move closer to your goals

Change is inevitable.

When you set your heart on something you want out of life.

When you mindfully implement visualization and meditation.

When you become crystal clear about your goals and what you want to see manifest in your life.

When your thoughts translate into actions…

Transformation is inevitable.

Change is often times scary, uncomfortable and stressful.

But if you want to change your current situation. If you want to go after something that is not currently in your life, it impossible to hold on to the past while trying to grasp the futur. 

It is impossible to hold on to status quo.

It is impossible to hold on to the person you were yesterday, if you are trying to change the person you want to be tomorrow.

Being true to yourself in the NOW is what will allow you to align yourself with your purpose and propel you to your destiny.

https://www.facebook.com/lifebyeloise/videos/215195172436576/

I hope you enjoy this video.

If you want to see more of my motivational and mindfulness videos, hop on over to my Facebook Page (CLICK HERE).

I post a new video weekly.

As always, I love hearing from you so after you’ve watched this video, send me an email or leave a comment below and let me know how you’ve dealt with the change in your life.

Love,

Eloise

TIPS TO SUPERCHARGE VISUALIZATION

A few weeks back, I wrote a blog post on 7 unconventional keys for increased productivity (you can read it HERE and get your cheat sheet HERE). One of those 7 keys is visualization. A few days after publishing the post, I started receiving emails from readers asking more details about this practice. Some readers confided that they were confused about how to implement this key since this key  seem to work so well for others but had never really worked for them. Other readers simply discarded that practice as inefficient.

Trust me, I understand your frustration.

I understand what it’s like to want something so bad and yet feel like it’s always out of reach.

I understand because I’ve been there.

But please don’t despair and trust me when I say this key works. But it needs the right elements to produce the right results.

 

Behind the superpower of visualization

 

Many have been led to believe that visualization is merely a form of daydreaming. That putting together a vision board is sufficient to bring forth miraculous results.

Although it can happen (we’ve all heard unicorn stories), it most often requires a little more heart and a little more soul.

In order to kick your visualization into high gear and harness the power of attraction, I’ve put together this video where I share two powerful tips that will transform your visualization practice from daydreaming to active materializing.

https://www.facebook.com/lifebyeloise/videos/209297676359659/

 

After you’ve watched the video, send me an email or leave me a comment below and let me know how you’ve personalized those tips to your specific situation and applied them to your visualization practice.

Love,

Eloise